Sometimes we have to stand by and watch people screw their lives up

Dr Phil says, “Show me your past and I will tell you your future!” While I do not agree with him whole heatedly – because people CAN change and DO change. But let’s face it – for change to occur you need one of 3 things. Massive pain, Having no other choice but to change and a feeling of being inspired or motivated. If one of these variables are not met – change will never happen and the person will continue to do the things he/she always did – hence Dr Phil’s statement above. In this sense human behavior is generally predictable. I have observed thousands upon thousands of people over my lifetime and I can you what a person is, how they feel, what their beliefs are and how they will react to certain situations by talking to them for 5 minutes. I have almost got it down to a science. Maybe one day I will have it published.

I am telling you I can do this, because I can smell trouble before it arrives. Prevention is always better than cure, but most people end up coming to me when the house is on fire and not the match stick is lit.  It is because of this ability that I can tell when something is not right and I can provide various solutions and suggest ways of dealing with the issue.

HOWEVER – some people, no matter how ohh-vee-aaas (obvious) something is, still want to go ahead and screw up.  Now don’t get me wrong – I am all for screwing up! Screwing up is the best way to learn and grow. But, when you tell someone the fire will burn you and they keep touching it again and again – now that’s a whole new level of wanting to get screwed!

In this case, what do you do with these people? Well, the short answer is – you do nothing.

The long answer is – these people can only learn once they get 3rd degree burns. They like to learn the hard way. So we have to respect this.

We also tend to become attached to the person’s problem and worry for them about what WILL happen. We do this because the shit will hit the ceiling and you know this, so you feel the anxiety and stress.  Then we create dis-ease and dis-comfort for ourselves. STOP. This person has chosen to do what he/she wants to do. Their higher self is allowing them to experience this. So let it go. If you love the person, you can be there for them when they need u.

I gave up trying to save the world a few years ago. I have learnt that 1. The world does not need saving. 2. You cannot save anyone, only guide them or be the beacon of light. 3. You can only create joy around you, and share that joy with people you meet.

There is an old saying, “If you want to make someone happy, mind your own business”. You have enough of your own plate to be worried about someone else. Trust me, the Universe has it under control. You just run along, have fun and enjoy your own adventure on earth.

So the next time, you know someone is screwing up – give them 1, 2 maybe 3 warnings. Then let them do what they want to do. UNLESS of course – they want to kill, kidnap, rape, take drugs, commit suicide….yeah you get the picture.

 

Stay awesome –

Love,

Hitesh